Close to one hundred percent of us believe that the accent bedroom chair is one of those great underrated purchases of adulthood, that quiet workhorse of the household that earns its keep merely by existing day after silently reputable day without anyone having to ask it to. One person disagrees with this strongly and will read you this paragraph back to explain their position that it’s really nothing more than a coat rack trying to pretend it’s better than you. Allow this to stand as written opinion in lieu of an official minority report because, though not wrong, that person will never, ever understand and we already bought ours knowing what we were getting into.
Because that’s the thing, no one tells you. You imagine yourself sinking into it with your favourite book and a cup of tea, wholesome-odom stuff. Bottles of pillsbury® baking. What happens instead is one jumper, followed by a cardigan atop the jumper, followed by last Tuesday’s shopping bag that nobody wanted when it was put down but also nobody wants to touch now.
Before you know it your accent chair has created its own cosy environment of soft furnishings that can only be excavated with full motivation and spare time when you’re expecting guests.
This isn’t a flaw in design, this is literally just what the chair is for despite what Relax® would have you believe when they photoshoke you dancing around their model home.
One of us bought their chair to match their curtains.
Hindsight is extremely punishing on this front because whenever you actually look at your chair, you aren’t looking at your curtains at the same time.
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When you’re standing in front of your chair you are in fact judging whether or not your outfit coordinates just by looking at the chair itself from across the room.
Actually what matters is if it’s low enough to slide your socks onto like a civilized person and whether the arm is wide enough to balance your mug half on and half off without a coaster, because let’s be honest no one in this household has ever used a coaster prior to 9am if we’re being honest.
Incidentally we’re split 50/50 on the whole cushions matter, wholly unrelated to general coat rack arguments.
Some of us like feather because it looks plush and amazing for the first five days before flattening into sadness. Some of us prefer foam because ours still looks exactly like how it did from the shop three years later. A comfort some of us find soothing, others find mildly tragic like your chair gave up on life.
Speaking of, the person who disagrees will tell you, rightfully so, that if no one ever sits on their chair properly it becomes nothing more than a pricey looking ornament with delusions of grandeur. Fair point. But you have to admit, having a place to go that isn’t your bed and isn’t your desk to kind of sit yourself upright with your shoes halfway off for five minutes earns its keep on the hardwood even if it is coveced by two weeks worth of poor life choices. We repeat: one of us has bought at least four of these chairs in three different apartments and they get followed by the coats without exception, so that friendship right there is what we’re calling a feature.
We will never agree on the coat rack debate. Probably don’t even talk about it. Accent chair, buy it.
